Day 40 – What am I Doing Wrong? #100Days


Today is Day 40 of #100Days

Did I wake up excited? Did I wake up like I needed to celebrate something?

Nope. Instead I woke up and my first thought was this:

“After 40 days of working out and going to the gym and hardly socializing, why haven’t I started to notice a difference?”

My second, third, fourth and so on thoughts went a little something like this:

“Why is this so hard? Why can’t I just wake up one morning and BAM! notice a difference? Why is it so easy for ‘fill in the blank’? Why does it seem to easy for Cindy? Why can I see it on her, but I can’t see it on myself? Why? Why?”

And the rest of my morning went just like that. I started to think that my feet were puffy and my fingers and my hands, and my clothes don’t fit right. And then I started to imagine that my neck was expanding and I suddenly now had a triple chin. I couldn’t look at myself in the mirror. Wait…does my jacket feel tight?

It’s madness. I am telling you. Madness. It took me a couple of hours to pull myself out of that slump, but thankfully I was able to do it. A friend asked me, “How did you pull yourself out of it?” and I said “Well, I just stopped thinking that way.” Which is so simple isn’t it? I’m not doing the #100Days because I want some quick fix. That’s not why I started it. That’s not why i was excited to take it on. I did it for me. Because I needed something to challenge me. I wanted to gain some momentum at the gym. I wanted to build back the muscle I lost after taking a 6 month hiatus from really doing much of anything. I wanted to feel stronger.

I figured, if I felt stronger physically, that would translate mentally and emotionally. And it has. Of course it has. I can do more push ups now. I can do squats forever now. I can even do a variation of mountain climbers, where I couldn’t do them before. Hello. I’ve done tire slams! I’ve never done those before. I can squat while holding a tire over my head. I’ve never done that before. I still hate doing burpees and i try and get out of them as often as possible, but now I can do push ups. Did I mention the push ups? I’ve even started trying pull ups. Those are dumb. The point is, there are things I can do that I couldn’t do before. I’ve started to notice little shifts. For example, (and you do not get to laugh), my underwear fits really well. Not like I bought underwear that was too small, but you ladies know what I’m talking about. They just fit better. I don’t feel as silly when I go to bootcamp, and I can’t do all the things that others can do. I just do what I can do. Eventually I’ll be able to do what they can do. Much of what we do, I’ve NEVER done before. I never would’ve imagined that I could do those things. The same goes for what I did on Saturday night. I didn’t think I could do some of those things either, but physical activity makes a difference in SO many areas of life…;)

So what the hell am I ragging on myself for? I have worked out for 40 days in a row (well after today), and I’m beating myself up? Do you see how crazy we are? Humans are insane. We never give ourselves a chance to succeed at anything because we just assume we’re going to fail. Don’t deny it. You know you do it too. People ask me about boxing all the time. I’ve been doing for a year and a half and I still can’t do the warm up skipping very well. I used to skip as a kid in my driveway all the time and I can’t for the life of me, skip properly anymore. So. Do I beat myself up about it? Do I not go? Do I skip the gym altogether? No! Of course not. I go. I keep going. And eventually, I’ll be able to skip properly. The point is that I warm up. That’s the point. The rest doesn’t matter. The rest is just noise in my head. Right?

Yeah. Easy for me to say isn’t it? But we all go there. We all do it. We all find something to beat ourselves up about. Don’t we? The other day, someone told me that I wasn’t putting in enough effort, and I needed to work harder. Not in reference to anything in particular, but about my workouts. I think I took it personally. But this person doesn’t know me. Nor does this person know that I am at the gym every single day of every single week, busting my ass (most of the time), what do you mean i’m not working hard enough??? After I had a chance to step away from it, and think about it, I know that’s not how the comment was intended. And no one really knows how hard I’m working, except me. And I know if I need to kick it up. Or if I need to go to yoga instead of bootcamp because my hip is sore. Or if I need to go for a walk after work so that I can manage to fit in a movie with a friend.

This is MY #100Days It can suck. Or it can not suck. I’d prefer it not suck.

I know we all feel like failures sometimes. I know we all think we’re not doing the right thing, the perfect thing, we could be doing more, we should be doing more, we should take out an extra 500 calories or we shouldn’t have had that cookie, or maybe i should walk to work, or maybe, or maybe, Or if only…Listen. We can “should/maybe/if only” ourselves to death.

I’ve been down that road for most of my life, especially in this arena. I’d like to try something new.

Day 40. Pretty effing awesome.



That Time I Farted At Bootcamp #100Days

Catchy title don’t you think? We’ll come back to that.


So welcome to Day 35. Holy macaroni.?! I’m not sure even I thought I’d make it to Day 35 and yet here I am. My mum says I look taller. I’m feeling pretty bloated these days, and the scale says I’m only down 1.6lbs in the past 2 weeks. Stupid fucking scale. But regardless. I’m coming off A super bad cold. Tomorrow will be officially 2 weeks since I got it and I’m still coughing a bit. But definitely better. I had a fever for 2 days, and did some yoga. Did i mention that? Yeah. I think I did. Back to bootcamp as of Monday. I know there are a number of others doing different #100Days challenges and I just thought I’d mention, mine is every single day for 100 days. Minimum of 30-45 minutes a day. Something that makes you break a sweat. Gets your heart rate up. Not hard to do when you’re sick and you’ve got a fever, and some would say you’re not supposed to work out when you have a fever…but those people have never done a #100Days challenge where if you miss a day, you have to start over. I know! I’m an idiot! I made up the rules. What was I thinking? But…we’re 35 days into it now. Cindy’s now doing a 30 day yoga challenge too which is awesome, so some days she does just the yoga, and other days she does the yoga AND bootcamp. She’s looking amazing! I noticed it at the class on Wed. She looks good. Lean. Something’s happening for her. For sure.

My friend Nicole is also doing a 30 day Yoga challenge. And she came up with a really amazing way to make the most of her practice. She’s been dedicating her practice, every day, to people in her life she’s inspired by. So every day she posts a photo on FB of the lucky person of the day, and shares who they are for her and how much she loves and appreciates them and makes it public. Who doesn’t love to be acknowledged publicly like that? It’s beautiful. Three days ago, I stole her idea (I actually asked for permission) and have started dedicating my workouts to the people in my life. So each day before I go and work out, I share on their FB page. First of all, who doesn’t love a great post on their FB wall? I mean really. And second of all..the challenge, is then no longer about me. I’m doing it to honour the people in my life. It’s a win/win. Last night’s workout was especially difficult and the trainer at the gym, just kept reminding me who I was there for. It was pretty cool. Very inspiring. Very inspired. Very awesome.

I highly recommend it as a daily practice. Keeps me grateful and inspired and on a day like today when the last thing I want to do is go and work out…I’ve already dedicated Day 35 to someone…So now I’m going for him. Not so much for me and the noise in my head telling me not to go. Win/Win.

So yeah…about that other thing. Monday the middle of ab crunches with a buddy…I farted. I wasn’t expecting it. I couldn’t do anything to stop it. I was on the floor crunching…and it just happened. Thankfully the music was up loud and no one actually heard it. That I know. I don’t wear headphones, so I know. oh man, I felt bad for my buddy. She didn’t even flinch. I was mortified but I kept going. I figured if I didn’t do or say anything, maybe she wouldn’t either. What you don’t know about me is I’m not a public farter. Not ever. Not in front of my mum even. Just not my thing. Not once in my last relationship. Gotta keep the magic alive. Y’know? So…this made my indiscretion at the gym all the more mortifying. I knew if I didn’t say anything…I’d never be able to look my buddy in the eyes again. So…during the stretch, I whispered to her “Hey…sorry for farting…” (don’t laugh). And GOD BLESS HER. Her response was simply “You aren’t the first. And you likely won’t be the last.” And that was it. I still think about it. And I did promise that I’d share all the elements of this #100Days and it would seem…farting at bootcamp is one of the elements. dangit.

Now you know.
Have you started your own #100days yet? If so, what are you doing?

I’d love to support and cheer you on. Share if you please.

Have a great weekend!
PS…I can’t believe I just told you I farted at bootcamp. Good God.

This Isn’t Going According To Plan #100Days


So, it’s Day 31. Of the #100Days workout challenge.

I’m still here. Alive. Kicking.


Oh yes. I got a full 4 weeks of perfect health under my belt and then BAM! My second cold of the year. A doozy this one too. I had a fever for 2.5 days. It’s a full 9 days later, and I’m still totally stuffed up and coughing. Not fun. If I had to guess, I’d say mostly, it was because I was exhausted. I took 2 vacation days so I could get some rest. My body was over worked. I was killing myself. Slowly. Using bootcamp as my weapon of choice. But I couldn’t help it. I committed. That’s how it works. And man. Let me tell you something. It isn’t going according to plan. Which is the funniest statement of all. Like I knew how it would go. Like I had a plan, and then I was going to follow it. Unfortunately, much like life, nothing works that way. You can plan something to the nth degree, but it’s never going to go that way. It can’t. Life has a way of getting in the way. Just like I can plan out a vacation in it’s entirety, in my planning, I can’t really account for things like meeting new people and perhaps wanting to go and do something different with them. Or a wine tour that I’ve just been offered. Or perhaps a super cheap plane ticket to another country I had no plans to visit, but always wanted to be in. Life doesn’t work like that.

Neither does this #100Days Getting sick wasn’t part of the plan. Do you know how hard it is to go from doing high intensity bootcamp and boxing on alternate days, to laying on the floor doing a yoga or pilates video? B O R I N G! But I did it. Every day, I found something I could do. Despite the fever. Despite the cold. AND I made sure I got ample rest. I’ll admit, I didn’t eat as well as I probably could have, but only because being sick, I wasn’t hungry. So I had a lot of extra protein shakes. But I stayed on track.

This morning, I woke up stuffed up and coughing, but I can’t stand the idea of another walk. Or some at home video work out. (Can you believe I still have my VCR hooked up…) I need to go be with my people, even if all I can do for the hour is ride the spin bike. At least I’m with them. It’ll give me some energy. It’ll get me moving in the way I’ve been missing.

So. What have I learned? That getting sick is the PERFECT excuse to bag this challenge. Throw my hands up in the air and say “forget about it!” And believe me…some of the thoughts that have run through my head have been just that. In the past, this would be right around the time that I’d quit. Don’t you know? I just got really sick…and I need to stop it. It’s not working. Thankfully, it’s not the past. Thankfully, this is not the Rita from the past. Thankfully this is me. The new me. The one who has learned discipline. The one who knows that I’m bigger than some stupid cold. I wouldn’t quit. Actually…I WOULD HAVE quit…but I didn’t. I didn’t quit.

I’m still standing.

And tonight, even though the skies have opened up and I feel pretty crappy..I’m going to bootcamp. I’m going to get some energy from my fellow bootcamp survivors, and I’m going to be sore tomorrow. And I bet I’ll feel awesome too. Or not. But it’s Day 31. What else is there for me to do?

Go forth and kick ass.

That’s what.

When’s the last time you took on something that stretched you out of your comfort zone and when the going got quit…or almost quit?

Thanks for being on this journey with me.

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