Do you think you know who you are? Like really know? Like who you know yourself is the absolute truth in who you really are, and that’s who you be? And you tell people that’s who you are and you live like that’s real?

I have spent my entire life thinking I knew who I was. Overweight. Single. Mostly fulfilled. In a job I didn’t like, but was okay. I was a good friend. I had great hair. I knew myself to be all of those things. Especially the first three. I figured that’s just how my life would go. I’d always be those things. By some fluke, I might “end up” in a relationship, mostly by accident, and then that would end.

Because that’s what happens.

Because it never works out for me anyway.

Because everyone else deserves it.

Because I haven’t earned it.

Because it’s easier not to.

Because it’s never going to work out anyway.

Because has ruled my life. I’m never going to lose weight, meet a guy, fall in love, get a new job, find what I want, have what I want, be able to x, y and z because…BECAUSE. The word because is a f**ker. The word because thinks it knows everything. We use the word because to string sentences together and everything that comes after the word because is generally a reason or an excuse, or something we really truly believe to be true.

I have lived my life by the because – It’s never going to work out for me anyway.

So, I applied on jobs I wanted but never got them. Because it never works out anyway. 

I went on dates, but they never turned into anything. Because it never works out anyway.

I never lost weight, no matter how hard I tried and how many times I tried. Because it never works out anyway. 

Can you imagine if we lived a life without “because”?

Imagine if we stopped giving ourselves reasons not to do something, not to go for something, not to stand for something. Not to apply for the job. Or ask the girl out. Or go on a date with the guy? Or ask for a raise? Imagine if we stopped thinking up reasons and excuses? Imagine if because was no longer followed by what we don’t think is possible, and we just did it for no reason?

What if we lost weight for no reason?

What if we got a new job for no reason?

What if we fell in love for NO reason?

I bet you’re having a hard time thinking that’s possible, aren’t you? It’s tough to wrap your head around it isn’t it? Why? Because that’s just how it’s always been? What if it wasn’t that way? What if I wasn’t meant to be over weight, and single and mostly unfulfilled?

Last year, I did something that never ever seemed possible for me to do. I lost 100lbs in a year. Yep. I sure did. I went through quiet a mish-mash roller coaster ride while I did it, but never did I utter a because. I committed to something, a new way of doing something, a new way of being and I knocked because on it’s a**.

Last year, I did something else that never ever seemed possible for me to do. I got a new job. After 16 years and endless applications, I got what I can only describe as my dream job doing what I love and helping people in a way I’ve always wanted to help them and I get paid to do it. And how did I do that? I took because out of the equation.

I’m also no longer unfulfilled. I have never been happier. And I look FANTASTIC. Seriously. AND…I’m out to turn because on it’s a** one more time.


I’m still single. And I know that I’ll fall in love this year.

Do you know how I know that?  The logical response here would be to say “because I’m ready.”

Instead, what I’m going to say is, if I can knock because on it’s a** in areas I never EVER considered seeing something else possible before…THIS is an area I can kick some a** in as well.

Watch me. I promise you. It’s happening.

So do me a favour. Pay attention to the because’s in your day. How often do you use that word? how often to you listen to it? How often do you justify letting the because get you out of doing something that matters to you? How often does because derail your life?

Let’s talk about it.

We don’t have much time left. Free yourself from “because” and go out and get what you want.

I dare you.

Rita xo


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